What happens to your story once you’re gone?

While pushing the stroller in the cemetery outside my mother-in-law’s house on chilly June mornings, I found myself thinking about the message that we leave behind us once we are gone. My baby found strolling on the unpaved roads in-between the graves soothing, which meant my sleepy brain was left with a somewhat peculiar activity of scanning the tombstones that I was passing by. Again and again. 

Every single one included name, surname and dates of birth and death. Some had notes of affection like “Forever in our hearts”, others included occupational title or civil status (e.g. “wife of”), a few had pictures of the deceased. Some graves were larger and more pimped than others seemingly as a way of getting around the fact that shrouds have no pockets. 

While caffeine was still slowly making its way into my bloodstream, I started wondering what or who this highly standardized information was for? The loved-ones that come and visit the grave surely know when the deceased was born or when s/he died while I can’t imagine why passers-by would care. While pictures have the effect of livening up the graveyard, they merely stay as features of Facebook of Dead of sorts.

All in all, we leave this world with a few pieces of unauthentic information none of which has any residual value. We sure have come along way since the pyramids, yet in some cultures we are still uncomfortable taking off without leaving any stamp behind us whatsoever. So we go for a collection of undistinctive facts – like on any other grave, like it’s been done forever and ever. 

What it all boils down to is that there lie stories six feet under. Stories that were lived by people who are no longer among us. Just imagine what a field of treasure a cemetery or columbarium would be if instead of dates etc every tombstone would contain the very best piece of advice the deceased had chosen to extract from his/her story of life and share with the fellow humans?

Better yet: why not leaving a barcode instead of a tombstone? QR code could be your pyramid! It’s up to you if you want to share a list of must-read books, a quote to live by, a selection of mouth-watering recipes or a love story to be scanned to life by anyone with a smartphone. The irony of life lies in the fact that we all collect important life lessons through a combination of failures and successes many of which perish together with our flesh and bones when we are gone. Few have the luxury publishing a book or two while alive, and not everything we would like to share is book-worthy. Physical or virtual, a tombstone could be where you “pin” your legacy in whatever shape or form you prefer and turn “game over” to “game on”. What you leave behind you is your afterlife.